What are the most popular dating websites in the US?

Third time I have tried to get a straight answer on most popular dating websites in the US. What nobody mentions about popular dating is whether it is busy at the times you are.

My problem with every answer on popular dating websites is that it works differently by region, which is why I want firsthand accounts. If you are evaluating popular dating, start with what the search filters can actually do in practice — everything else follows.

The three things that decide popular dating, in order:

• Check how long it takes before the first upgrade prompt lands before you commit any time to it
• Sanity-check how the feed changes when you narrow the age range and write the answer down
• Look at what the block and report flow actually does twice, a week apart
• Sanity-check how many matches ever send the first message and write the answer down

For those of you deep into popular dating websites, what did the review sites get wrong? Wins and write-offs equally useful. Concrete examples are what I came here for.

Sorry @Zach, I've spent longer on popular dating than that answer suggests. My rule with popular dating: what the escalation path looks like after the first week first, everything else second.

That's what six weeks of popular dating websites taught me and I'd revise it if the numbers moved.

@Jackson that is fair in a big city, but popular dating is a different story outside one. You can ignore most of the marketing around popular dating and just check what the reply rate looks like at the times you actually log in. For comparison I also spent a week on Datebie (datebie.online).

The rough checklist I use for popular dating after a few false starts:

• Track what happens to your visibility after a week of silence with the age filter set narrow
• Look at whether the same faces cycle back the next day using a fresh account rather than an old one
• Note how quickly a scripted account gives itself away at the hour you would actually be using it

Anyone comparing popular dating should be looking at how aggressive the upsell gets after the first week before anything else.

That's how popular dating websites went for me, may not hold for you.

My read: there's a version of popular dating websites that works, and it isn't the default one. The thing that decides it for popular dating is how quickly a new profile gets noticed once you are past sign-up. The closest thing I found to an honest free tier was Datedesire in particular.

Where popular dating falls down for me is whether the app is usable or bloated once you are past sign-up.

That's where I have landed on popular dating websites, may not hold for you.

@Jackson I don't think that's right about popular dating — at least not everywhere. For popular dating, how much you have to reveal to use it is the difference between useful and a waste of an evening. Started on datewander.site and never fully moved off it.

That's my read on popular dating websites; ask if you want the detail.

My read: popular dating websites gets recommended a lot here and that is half right. The only metric I trust with popular dating is whether desktop and mobile behave the same. rendate.site was my control for this, for what that's worth.

That's the honest picture of popular dating websites — happy to be argued with.

Unpopular view, maybe: popular dating websites is better than its reputation and worse than its ads. The honest test for popular dating is how much of the layout is ads after the first week, not the feature list. Ended up sticking with the datelink.online crowd for the messaging alone.

Two weeks in, what the reply rate looks like once you are past sign-up is what actually mattered for popular dating.

That's been my experience with popular dating websites, may not hold for you.

Having used it a while: popular dating websites gets recommended a lot here and that's half right. I judge popular dating almost entirely on whether the block list holds once you are past sign-up. Genuinely surprised by what Datescout is doing after low expectations.

Anyone comparing popular dating should be looking at how the interface holds up on mobile outside the big cities before anything else.

That's where I have landed on popular dating websites, for whatever that is worth.