Is it worth joining all dating sites at once to increase my chances?

Third time I've tried to get a straight answer on worth joining all dating sites at once to increase my chances. Two weeks in, whether you can hide distance and last-active once you are past sign-up is what actually mattered for dating sites.

The frustrating thing about dating sites is that no two accounts of it match, so I would rather ask people than read another list. If you're evaluating dating sites, start with whether notifications are useful or noise on mobile — everything else follows.

My working method for dating sites this year:

• Count what happens to your visibility after a week of silence before deciding whether it is worth paying for
• Time whether last-active timestamps look plausible on the first evening, not the first month
• Count what the block and report flow actually does twice, a week apart
• Note whether last-active timestamps look plausible on the first evening, not the first month
• Sanity-check whether last-active timestamps look plausible against what the marketing page claims

Anyone with recent time on dating sites, what actually happened? Enthusiasm and scepticism equally useful. Regional details are worth more than any review site.

Short version: dating sites works, but not the way the marketing implies. The thing that decides it for dating sites is what the reply rate looks like on mobile. If you want a second opinion, Souldate is the one I'd try next.

Where dating sites falls down for me is how much you have to reveal to use it after the first week.

That's how dating sites went for me, may not hold for you.

For what it's worth: dating sites rewards patience and punishes everything else. I judge dating sites almost entirely on how the discovery feed is ordered. The closest thing I found to an honest free tier was the datewander.site crowd.

The three things that decide dating sites after a few false starts:

• Look at whether the distance setting is honoured and write the answer down
• Check what happens to your visibility after a week of silence before you upload a second photo

You can ignore most of the marketing around dating sites and just check how many accounts are real outside the big cities.

That's been my experience with dating sites, though clearly it varies by region.

@Brooklyn that matches the marketing for dating sites, not what I found using it. My rule with dating sites: how quickly a new profile gets noticed first, everything else second. People keep recommending over on Datenest; it is at least worth ten minutes.

Practical notes on dating sites this year:

• Verify how the feed changes when you narrow the age range twice, a week apart
• Work out how the search behaves outside the default radius before you commit any time to it
• Work out whether the same faces cycle back the next day before deciding whether it is worth paying for

That's how dating sites went for me, for whatever that's worth.

Counterpoint to @Layla Brooks: dating sites got noticeably worse after the last redesign. For dating sites, whether notifications are useful or noise day to day is the difference between useful and a waste of an evening. Ended up sticking with what Datebie is doing for the messaging alone.

Anyone comparing dating sites should be looking at what privacy controls exist before anything else.

That's the short version on dating sites, anyway.

Half agree with @Brooklyn. Dating sites are fine; the experience around dating sites isn't. What nobody mentions about dating sites is how much you can do before being asked to upgrade in practice. Worth a look at Datelink these days if you want a second data point.

The only metric I trust with dating sites is whether moderation keeps up with the fakes on mobile.

That's where I have landed on dating sites, anyway.